The Duration That Constitutes Severing Ties of Kinshipالمدة التي يكون بها المسلم قاطعًا لرحمه

The brother asks about the length of time after which, if a Muslim delays beyond it, he becomes one who has severed his ties of kinship. Before that, I will mention two important matters.

The first matter: maintaining ties of kinship (silat al-arham) is obligatory, and this is among the definitive matters of the Shari'ah. Allah, Majestic and Exalted is He, has attached a severe punishment to severing the ties of kinship, saying, "So would you perhaps, if you turned away, cause corruption on earth and sever your ties of kinship? Those are the ones whom Allah has cursed, so He deafened them and blinded their vision." And in the two Sahihs, from the hadith of al-Zuhri from Muhammad ibn Jubayr ibn Mut'im, the Prophet ﷺ said, "One who severs ties of kinship will not enter Paradise."

The second matter: who is the relative (rahim) whom one sins by cutting off? The answer is: among women, she whom you are not permitted to marry by reason of lineage — not by marriage-relation nor by milk kinship (rada'); and among men, he whom, were he a woman, you would not be permitted to marry by reason of lineage — not by marriage-relation nor by milk kinship.

The third matter, which is the one relating to the question: the reference point for how often ties of kinship must be maintained is custom ('urf), because this is something not defined in the Book, nor in the Sunnah, nor in the statement of a Companion, so it is referred back to custom — on condition that the people's custom is not itself one of severance. Whenever the custom is severance, no account is taken of their custom. This custom differs from one era to another and from one place to another. And the more a servant preserves his ties of kinship and keeps the intervals between visits short, the greater his reward, the purer his state, and the nearer he is to the pleasure of his Lord, because this is something beloved to Allah and beloved to the Messenger ﷺ. As mentioned a moment ago, it is among the matters settled with certainty in Islam, and severing the ties of kinship without cause counts as one of the major sins, because the Prophet ﷺ said, "One who severs ties of kinship will not enter Paradise" — and as already mentioned, this is agreed upon.

If a servant is unable to maintain ties with his relatives in person, then the telephone takes the place of that — for example, where the relatives are in a country other than his own and he is unable to travel to them, he telephones them, and the obligation [of visiting] drops from him so long as he is unable. And if he is unable even to telephone them, then what is obligatory upon him is to write to them, and this is considered one of the forms of maintaining ties. Allah, Majestic and Exalted is He, says, "Allah does not burden a soul beyond its capacity." And in the two Sahihs, from the hadith of Abu Hurayrah, the Prophet ﷺ said, "When I command you with something, do of it what you are able," and this is what lies within one's ability. And in the two Sahihs, from the hadith of Anas, the Prophet ﷺ said, "Whoever loves that his provision be expanded and his life be extended, let him maintain his ties of kinship." So maintaining ties of kinship is a means of drawing provision and of long life.

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